Every year, even for the Jewish New Year which is in September, and the “traditional” new year in January, I always like to look back on how I have evolved.
2018 was different for me because this was the first year in a while where the evolution/change was not mostly physical.
By physical I don’t necessarily mean growing taller or weight changed, I mean to be honest this was the first year in the past 4 years where I did not cute my hair and I generally looked the same all year, but what I really mean by physical is the physical change in location, and situation.
The past years have been fast change for me with family members passing, family members moving, my role with the family adjustments, my move to Arizona/starting college, living in the dorms for a year, the relationships I created with old and new people in my life, then the following year moving to an apartment, to many other things in between…to
2018, where my physical situation of people, living location did not change dramatically. So when I was looking back on this year, at first I felt that things did not change since the prior year, except for new people, experiences, but no “physical” big change, but I had it all wrong.
Don’t get me wrong, the prior years I have changed a lot mentally, but I believe that most of us analyze the physical changes in front of us more-so then the changes we have made mentally. I at least need to stop doing this.
2018 I truly found myself, who I want to be, where I want the direction of my career to go, and I am the most comfortable in myself that I’ve ever been. But that does not mean nothing will change now since I “found myself”, I just understand myself now more than ever.
This year, I did start my first semester in the business college at my university, which was a whole new curve-ball, I guess that is a “physical” change but it hit me more on a mentality note.
Ever since I was young I always felt that I needed to know exactly who I am, but this year I realized that in your life you are NEVER supposed to 110% (or 100% if you want to evaluate that way) full understanding of yourself, or you might as well not be living your life.
So when I realized that this year I have found myself, I mean the path I am on, where I want to be, the understanding of myself as a person BUT also having knowledge that there will be things that will change.
Whether it is doing a new self project, or aspiring different aspects in the path I am going on. Being in the business school helped me with this, but everyone has to give themselves some credit on their own, despite resources, so I give some credit to myself as well.
This year I know myself 100%, (out of 110%) but there is 10% of you that doesn’t know what you will want in the future, or even what you want presently.
I know I want/am going into the technology industry, I feel right going that path, and I have things like projects I am working on and ones I will start later on this career path, but I know a part of me will change or maybe find new things on this path that I will want to endure than expected.
I also learned that you can’t expect people to know or recognize the understandings you have of yourself. Nor can you compare your path and projects to someone else’s. You may feel people know or maybe should give you credit for doing projects or knowing how your going on the path you want to be on (for your career or personal), but the biggest acknowledgement I learned and you should understand is:
you need to do these things for yourself, not expecting people to know nor acknowledge/applaud you.
If you want to tell people about how you see yourself and what you’re doing, go ahead, they may help you with a project you have, but don’t do projects for yourself expecting the world and/or your peers to know.
Everyone has their own life and self-discovery, everyone is focused on their own, don’t take it personal. In the end you won’t be doing your projects or daily things in life for the right reasons.
That is the 10% I think everyone needs to be aware of. This is one of the main aspects of myself that I have learned and evolved my life in 2018, which will carry me into years to come.
So whether your change this year was more physical or mental, good or bad, make sure to look at all those aspects, not just one. Sometimes the ones that make the most effect in your life going forward are not always the physical changes, but the mental understandings of your life and yourself.
Cheers to 2019! Happy New Year!